


a question of space, a matter of time

by enbyboiwonder



Category: Star Trek, Star Trek: Enterprise
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Getting Together, M/M, POV Second Person, Post-Canon, Reconciliation, TATV didn't happen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-20
Updated: 2020-05-20
Packaged: 2021-03-02 17:54:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 889
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24280918
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/enbyboiwonder/pseuds/enbyboiwonder
Summary: Trip visits Mal while theEnterpriseis getting ready to set off on her next five-year mission.
Relationships: Malcolm Reed/Charles "Trip" Tucker III, Past T'Pol/Charles "Trip" Tucker III
Kudos: 19





	a question of space, a matter of time

**Author's Note:**

> Title from [Of Space and Time](https://youtu.be/GFcGI02iDgM) by City and Colour, which is actually a pretty fitting song.
> 
> I originally had a different idea (and it's briefly referenced in this) that I think mighta tied into a late-S4 episode, but I was an idiot and didn't write it down and of course I've forgotten it, so it turned into this post-series thing. I don't really know what this is, but I guess it's how I'm reconciling canon (except TATV—that's a holoprogram made for entertainment and thus creative liberties were taken and actual events are nothing at all like portrayed. Fuck canon, anyway).

You stop in front of the door at the address you got from Jon. You raise a hand, hesitate, then knock, shoving your hands in the pockets of your jeans while you wait, listening for any sign of movement on the other side. It isn't long before the door swings open.

"Hey, Mal," you greet. His jaw is set slightly, and he doesn't offer you a greeting back, but he doesn't close the door in your face either, so you suppose that's something, at least. "Can I come in?"

Wordlessly he steps back to let you in, and you follow him inside. The apartment's practically bare, impersonal and almost spartan, but then, you didn't really expect much else, especially from a temporary residence. The door clicks shut behind you, and you turn around to face him.

"Do you want something to drink?" he asks, ever the perfect host, starting past you into the apartment.

You shake your head, though he can't see you. "No, thanks." Then, before you can lose your nerve: "I want to apologize for how I acted after the Xindi attack. You were only tryin'a help, and I knew that, but at the time I couldn't let myself accept that Lizzie was really gone, and I ended up takin' my anger out on you and pushin' you away. I shouldn'ta done that."

"Trip," Mal says, almost helpless as he meets your eyes. "We've gone over this before, and I've already forgiven you a long time ago."

"I know, but I gotta say it again. I really regret pushin' you away like that. And it's more'n that. All that stuff with T'Pol… well, Sim had feelings for her, and he's me, right, so I thought that meant I had to have feelings for her too. And then we accidentally bonded and I thought I really did have feelings for her, but I didn't, I was just feelin' her feelings for me through the bond, or whatever. And kissin' you while me and T'Pol were still bonded admittedly wasn't the best idea I ever had either. The whole situation was a mess." You snort out a humorless laugh, but Mal's still blinking like he's caught on the word _still_.

"When we were on Vulcan," you continue, serious—your self-pity can wait; it isn't why you came here— "we had the bond broken. When I look at her now, I don't feel anything I don't feel toward any other coworker, considern' the circumstances.

"I never wanted to hurt you, and I don't think I'll ever be able to forgive myself for that. I still love you, Mal, I always have—I never stopped. And I'm not exptectin' anything to come of this or for you to even want me back. I just wanted you to know the truth. I didn't want ya to go on thinkin' things about me that weren't true."

He's quiet, eyes focused somewhere beyond your left shoulder as he chews at his bottom lip. You take a half-step back, lingering and unsure whether your presence is still welcome, but settling on giving him some space. It's a lot to drop on a guy, and Mal never was much of one for big, emotional outpourings. His gaze snaps back to you, then, drawn by the movement; there's something desperate in the blue of his eyes, and it roots you to the spot, unbalanced. It's with a certain breathless uncertainty that you watch him approach, that he steps into your space, reaching up to curl his hands around your shoulders.

You let him guide you down 'til your foreheads nearly touch, 'til you're close enough that you're sharing breath, that you can feel his warm against your lips, your hands settling on his waist. One thumb traces gently over your cheekbone as his eyes study yours. "Do you mean all that?" he asks, hushed.

"I do."

His pretty lashes flutter as his eyes flick down to your lips, and he leans in to kiss you softly. It feels like a first kiss, and by all rights, it is: that first desperate, too-short, ill-advised kiss years ago notwithstanding, this is uncharted territory, you're both feeling each other out anew, unsure of quite where you stand but figuring it out quick. He breaks the kiss, but it's only to push up on his toes and kiss you again, fingers threaded in your hair, as sure as the first was tentative. Your lips part easily for his questing tongue, your hands skating up his back to clutch at the fabric of his shirt and hold him close; you're only too willing to give yourself over to him, completely, after all these years of refusing to acknowledge what was right in front of you. Mal hums into the kiss, pressing flush against you, when you slip your hands under the hem of his shirt, and you let them rove over every inch of warm skin that you can reach without breaking the kiss. You could lose yourself like this, and you wouldn't even mind.

"Okay," Mal says, breathless, as he lets himself fall back on his heels, expression soft, and you can't help the grin that curves your lips. "Okay."

You pull him into a hug, and against his hair, you murmur, "It was always you, Mal. It was always you."

**Author's Note:**

> And then they date for a while and get married and eventually are both given their own captaincy because they both deserve happiness, dammit. And Mal deserves a promotion. Another reason to ignore TATV—it says that even after ten years, he's still only a lieutenant, like, uh, what? He's gone through way too much shit not to have made at least lieutenant commander by then.


End file.
